The Return of Timmy the Barbarian
by SOLmaster
Summary: Jorgen reads a story called The Return of Timmy the Barbarian, and this time adds Jimmy, Danny, and SpongeBob to the story as well. Now the six must go rescue a warrior princess in the story. Cowritten with dannyfangirl. Read and Review
1. Chapter 1

_A new silly story that was my friend, dannyfangirl's idea. The full plot is..._

_Plot: When Timmy was bored, Jorgen came and decided to read him a story called The Return of Timmy the Barbarian. He also decides to put Jimmy, Danny, and SpongeBob in the story. In the story, Timmy, Nagules, Cosmoleus travel to save a warrior princess from an evil king, and along the way they meet new friends who could help._

_Now enjoy the first part and be sure to review._

**The Return of Timmy the Barbarian**

In Dimmsdale, Timmy was in his room, lying on the bed.

"Bored...bored...so bored..." Timmy moaned.

Then, all of a sudden, there was a huge explosion in his room.

"What the?" Timmy wondered.

"Oh no!" Wanda said as she and Cosmo as in fish form, "I know that explosion anywhere..."

Then, the smoke clears and they see Jorgen Von Strangle standing there.

"AAAHHHH!!! JORGEN!" the three screamed.

"What are you doing here?" Timmy wondered and backed away from him with his pillow as his shield.

"I have come to show you my thanks for your help with the problem we had in Fairy World." Jorgen answered.

"What problem..." Timmy wondered.

"Why don't you remember Timmy?" Cosmo asked.

Timmy then has a flashback.

* * *

In his flashback, he and the fairies even Jorgen are in Fairy World. 

"Push that pedestal over there!" Jorgen yelled angrily.

Timmy and the fairies painfully push the pedestal to a wall.

"Not that way! That way!" Jorgen pointed at they push it there. "No! That way!"

Jorgen didn't notice that a lamp was shaking and suddenly falls. Timmy looks up and gasps. "Jorgen! Watch out!" he cried.

"Huh?" Jorgen turns around and moved where the ceiling lamp falls and Jorgen notices it crushed on the floor. "Turner!" he yelled out. Timmy was frightened until he grabs him and hugs him. "You saved my life!" he smiled hugging him as Timmy is literally crushed by Jorgen's muscles.

* * *

The flashback ends with Timmy now remembering that. "Oh yeah, it was no big deal really. You didn't have to get me anything...what did you get me? Money? A car?" 

"Something even better!" Jorgen smiles along with Timmy and closes his eyes, until he is crushed by a book. Timmy gets up to see the book.

"A book?" Timmy asked.

"Better!" Jorgen smiles, "A story told by me!"

"What?!" Timmy cried.

Cosmo and Wanda gasp as they remembered what happened last time.

"No, its okay," Timmy told Jorgen. "You REALLY didn't have to get me anything."

"Oh, but I must!" Jorgen said.

"Sorry," Timmy spoke, "Um...cuz I gotta go meet Jimmy, Danny, and SpongeBob soon..."

Jorgen bows his head, but he lightens up. "That's okay! Your friends can be in the story as well!"

"What?!" Timmy shouted.

"Yeah!" Jorgen said raising his wand.

* * *

In Retroville, Jimmy was in his lab working on an experiment. "Carefully...carefully..." Jimmy said until he was stuck by magic and froze, "Hey! What gives?" 

In Bikini Bottom, SpongeBob was happily flipping patties in the Krusty Krab. He noticed he suddenly stopped what he was doing. "Ooh, this feels funny."

Meanwhile in Amity Park, Danny was mindlessly watching TV in his room. "So bored..." Danny spoke when he froze, "What the?" Before he knew it, he suddenly poofs and disappears into thin air.

* * *

In Timmy's room, Jimmy, Danny, and SpongeBob appear and fall onto the ground next to Timmy. 

"Guys?" Timmy asked.

"Timmy?" Jimmy and Danny asked.

"Where? I can't see a thing!" SpongeBob muffled.

"That's because you're facedown on the floor," Timmy mentions to SpongeBob where Jimmy and Danny didn't notice that they are sitting on him.

"You wouldn't have anything to do with this, would you?" Jimmy asked Timmy.

"Nope, He does..." Timmy said pointing. Jimmy and Danny turn to gasp, seeing Jorgen.

"Now, we shall begin the story." Jorgen said.

"Oh no!" Timmy groaned.

"Oh yes!" Jorgen began. "This is the story of...The Return of Timmy the Barbarian."

"We're just supposed to listen to a story?" Danny asked confused.

"No ghost boy, you're IN it!" Jorgen corrected.

He laughs and raises his wand at Timmy, Cosmo, Wanda, Danny, Jimmy, and SpongeBob, who try to run away, but disappear into light and flow into Jorgen's book.

* * *

In the story, Timmy opens his eyes to see nothing. "Cosmo? Wanda?" Timmy wondered, "Jimmy? Danny? SpongeBob?" 

'_Okay! Everyone is all set!'_ Jorgen's voice spoke as Timmy hears it and there is another poof.

Now it is Timmy once again, only with muscles that make him look hulky and carries a big rock that reads, 'The Return of Timmy the Barbarian.'

Jorgen narrated, _'Timmy the Barbarian, Nagules, and Cosmoses: the once again human-faced packmule.'_

"Right!" Timmy spoke in his barbarian get-up, "If you must know, I'm Timmy the Barbarian with my huge muscles that make me powerful and super strong!" He smiles and does a pose.

Wanda comes in with a worn out yellow dress, a whip, and has a squirrel hat on his head. "And I'm Nagules!" she said, "With my trusty whip and ability to nag, nag, nag...a lot."

Then, Cosmo now holding a lot of luggage and his head, and has a green mule head. "And I'm Cosmoleus," he said, "The mule headed and weakest servant of Timmy who carries a lot of his stuff."

Jorgen narrated, _'Timmy received word that the warrior princess was being held captive by his arch-enemies.'_

"Oh, my gosh!" Timmy realized, "The warrior princess is held captive! Wait, who's the warrior princess?"

'_The mysterious warrior princess is the heir to the kingdom,'_ Jorgen explained, _'And if you rescue her, you and she can get married! Plus, I hear she's hot!'_

That's when Timmy finds a picture of the princess in a Xelda like get-up although her hair is covering her face. But Timmy smiles. "Man, she's pretty!" he smiled. He turns to Nagules and Cosmoleus. "Come, let's go! We have a princess to save!" Then he smiled and whispered. "And maybe even get a kiss."

Jorgen narrates, _'and so...our heroes and even Cosmoleus...'_

"Hey!" Cosmoleus snaps.

_'…Must go on a quest to find the princess!' Jorgen continues, 'But first must get new weapons to fight the monsters guarding the princess!'_

"Awesome!" Timmy cheered. "Where do we get weapons?"

_'You get it from that shop over there...'_

Timmy, Nagules, and Cosmolues turn to see the blacksmith shop. "Oh," Timmy said.

They enter the shop and saw it looked empty.

"Hey, there isn't anyone in here." Timmy said disappointed.

_'They were all unaware that the shop was not really empty, but the owner was looking around for something.'_

"Hey, look!" Cosmolues pointed, "A goat!"

Timmy and Nagules turn to see the rear end of the goat in the bush. "We should help it," Nagules said to Timmy as he runs to the goat, and Nagules turns to Cosmoleus, "And have you brushed your mane yet? And stand up straight! Nag! Nag! Nag!"

They went up to the goat. "Um...hello?" Timmy asked.

He takes the goat and pulls him out. Timmy was shocked to see that the goat was really a satyr, a half human and half goat, and it was Jimmy Neutron as he also wears red armor on him. "Hey do you mind?" he asked.

Timmy screams and drops him. "What are you supposed to be?" he asked.

"I'm Jimocretes!" the satyr spoke, "I'm the blacksmith who's able to built tons of weapons that are powerful to slay a single beast."

They were silent for a bit, but then, Timmy and Cosmoleus started to chuckle at Jimmy's appearance.

"Ha, ha!" Cosmoleus laughed, "You have goat butt!"

_'And as Cosmoleus laughs, he trips on a bug,' _Jorgen narrates.

Jimocretes growled, "Jorgen Von Strangle, I'll get you for this."

A bug appears and Cosmoleus trips. "AAAHHH!!!" he falls on the ground, "Tell me about it."

"Okay Jimocretes," Nagules spoke, "Now that we found you, we need strong weapons to fight the monsters and save the warrior princess! Oh, and put some pants on! No one wants to see you without them! Nag, nag, nag!"

"You want weapons?" Jimocretes asked. "Fine. I'll give you what I have, just step into my office."

Jimocretes and the others go to the shop. Jimocretes takes something from his truck which was a sword and shield. "Here you go," he spoke giving the weapons to Timmy, "This sword is able to penetrate the hard skin of a dragon and the shield is powerful to take on fire and boulders, and one important thing to remember is that these weapons originated from-"

While Jimocretes was talking, Jorgen interrupted, _'Blah, blah, blah, no one wants to hear this goat man talk, we'll all get bored to tears.'_

"Hey!" They shouted, but Jorgen turned the page already.

_'And so, the non-important Jimocretes decides to join Timmy, Nagules, and Cosmoleus,'_ Jorgen spoke, _'Where they have no idea where they're going..."_

"I heard that!" Jimocretes snapped and turns to Timmy, "You do know where we're going right?"

"Nope," Timmy answered.

"You should have brought a map!" Nagules snapped, "I told you a thousand times to bring a map! Why don't you? Nag, nag, nag!"

_'When they thought they had lost their way for good, Timmy spotted a cave that led to an underground spooky underworld.'_

"Cool! A spooky cave!" Timmy smiled about to run in.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," a peppy voice told. Suddenly, from the sky, a sponge falls down on the ground. He was in golden armor with a gold helmet with wings and has gold sandals with wings also.

"Who are you supposed to be?" Timmy asked.

"I'm King Neptune's messenger, SpongeHermes!" the sponge said, "I was sent by him to help you find the warrior princess and fight the monsters!"

"Awesome!" Timmy cheered. "And since you're supposed to help us, you can tell us if it's safe to go down that spooky cave."

SpongeHermes just shrugged and answered, "I don't see why not."

"Guys, I still don't think this is very safe." Jimocretes said.

_'Ignoring Jimocretes's babbling boring nonsense, they continued into the cave.'_ Jorgen narrated that annoyed Jimocretes a bit. _'But first Cosmoleus tripped on another bug.'_

A bug appears and Cosmoleus trips on it. "I hate this!" He yelled out.

Jorgen laughed, _'That never gets old! Anyway they traveled down into the cave of the underworld where it was dark and dangerous.'_

"Why is this cave dark and dangerous anyway?" Nagules wondered.

"That's probably because of Dannes, the demon warrior and head commander of King Goobot, the one who kidnapped the princess," SpongeHermes said, "He guards this place and will destroy anything or anyone who comes here."

"What?!" They all shouted.

"Then why did you let us go in here?" Jimocretes angrily asked.

SpongeHermes answered, "Well, but then it wouldn't have made the story more interesting."

_'The little sponge was right, especially when an arrow shot at them.'_

"WHAT?!" the gang cried when an arrow shot and nearly hit Timmy's head. They turn around to see more arrows shooting and coming at them.

Timmy grabbed his sword and spun around like a propeller deflecting the arrows.

"You intruders who defy the king won't be going one step further." A voice called out.

The five turn around to see a warrior in armor and helmet on and has an ax with a flaming giant blade and a fiery chain around his torso.

"You must be Dannes," Timmy guessed.

"Gee, how did you guess?" Jimocretes asked, "The flaming ax, the deadly warrior, or the part that he's guarding that giant door behind him?"

Jorgen narrated, _'yes, it was Dannes, although still weak and puny...'_

"Hey!" Dannes complained.

_"...He was still skilled as a warrior and also girl magnet.'_

"Really? Awesome!" Dannes said as he grinned and pointed over to Carrie and Lizz who were somehow in the background screaming with hearts in there eyes.

"You let us through right now!" Timmy ordered.

"Never!" Dannes told and threw his ax at Timmy, but he blocked his ax with his sword.

Timmy smiles and flings his sword at Dannes, which pinned him to the wall.

"This is too easy," Timmy smiled, "And what's under that helmet anyway?"

He chuckles and takes off the helmet, which shows only a skull as it moves and glares at him and lights up into green flames.

Timmy gasped to see his form. "AHH!!! He's a skull!"

"So, you figured it out." Dannes said.

"Maybe it's because he removed your helmet." Nagules said. "Maybe you should eat more meat, and nag, nag, nag!"

Well, he's stuck there now, and we can get through the door now." Jimocretes pointed out.

"Right!" Timmy agreed.

_'Yes, they can get to the door now,' Jorgen narrates, "Until Vlad the vampire gargoyle attacks!'_

A beam shot at them and they turn to see Vlad with wings, cape, and claws.

"Did I forget to mention him?" Dannes asked as he smirked.

"Duh!" Timmy told as Vlad grabs Timmy with his claws. "AAAAGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!"

"I'll save you Timmy!" Nagules shouted as she grabbed a hold of Timmy with her whip and she and Vlad tugged on Timmy.

_'As Timmy and Nagules fight,' _Jorgen spoke,_ 'SpongeHermes and Jimocretes ask for help...'_

"Dannes, you have to help us!" SpongeHermes said to him.

"Why should I?" Dannes asked.

"Well, although you're evil and work for the king, Timmy just spared your life right?" SpongeHermes asked, "Right Timmy?"

"Right," Timmy answered. "Although I was gonna kill him later- wait, I mean just help!"

Dannes looks up at Timmy and looks down at SpongeHermes, and he just shrugs. "Fine. Working for the king was dumb anyway."

Dannes breaks free and shoots fire at Vlad. Vlad yells in pain and drops Timmy. Timmy screams until SpongeHermes and Dannes catch up.

"Thanks dude!" Timmy smiled at Dannes, "And Nagules is right. You gotta eat more meat."

Vlad recovers quickly and roars at them. "You shall pay for this!" Vlad yelled daggering at Dannes, "Even you traitor!"

"And proud of it." Dannes replied as he punched Vlad in the face, knocking him away.

Vlad slams into the wall, but got up and roared.

"What are we gonna do?" Jimocretes wondered.

"Vlad's a gargoyle," Dannes explained, "We should reach the other side, the sun's his weakness."

"Great idea, Dannes." Timmy said. "To the door!"

_'They all ran to the door with Vlad trying to attack them while they were pushing the door open.' _Jorgen narrated. _'Then they got the door open and the intense sunlight shined on the gargoyle.'_

"No! Not the light!" Vlad screeched, "No! NOO!!!" In an instance, Vlad turns to stone from the light.

"Alright," Timmy cheered. "Thanks a lot Dannes! Dannes?"

_'As the sunlight shined on Dannes, his skull body turned into a regular everyday puny human, who of course had ghost powers also.'_

"Hey!" Dannes snapped as his voice was different now and not dark and he had raven black hair and blue eyes and still wore his armor suit and had a sweatband around his head, turning human like Jorgen said.

"Well, now you can help us rescue the warrior princess." Timmy told Dannes.

"Very well," Dannes said trying to cool. "Let us forge on."


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2**

'_Now that they had the warrior Dannes," _Jorgen narrated. _'Uh…let's see, they travel, and travel, and trave, until the brave warriors, except for Cosmoleus and the boring Jimocretes, reach the volcano with the castle on top.'_

"Hey!" Jimocretes snapped but suddenly tripped on something. He gets up and screams to see it was a statue of a small squirrel that seemed life like.

"Oh no," Dannes groaned, "We have to pass the monsters first, starting with Beautiful Gorgudusa."

"Big deal," Timmy scoffed. "How bad can she be?"

They turn around and see Beautiful Gorgudusa who had snake hair and fangs. "Look into my eyes." She said.

The boys gasped. "Don't look at her!" Dannes cried as he covered his eyes.

_'But was too late,'_ Jorgen narrates_, 'Beautiful Gorgudusa changes Timmy, Jimocretes, and Cosmoleus into stone.'_

"I warned them." Dannes said.

'_Dannes was unaware that there was a way return Timmy, Cosmoleus, and Jimocretes back to normal.'_

"Really?" Dannes asked. "How? How? How?"

_'But before he could get the answer, Beautiful Gorgudusa grabbed him and tried to turn him into stone.'_

"What?!" Dannes shouted.

Beautiful Gorgudusa grabbed a hold of Dannes and tried to turn him to stone, but he closed his eyes.

Dannes changes to ghost form and punches Beautiful Gorgudusa, and Dannes took out his flaming chain.

He uses his chain to grab Gorgudusa as she yelps. "Hee yaw!" he yelled out and spins her around with his chain.

_'Then out of some mere coincidence that cannot be explained, Dannes soon realizes that Beautiful Gorgudusa's gaze can turn them back to normal.'_

"Thank you." Dannes sarcastically said.

Dannes quickly ran in front of the Timmy, Cosmoleus, and Jimocretes statues. "Hey ugly, come and stare at me!" He taunted.

"Ugly?" Gorgudusa growled and shot an eye beam at Dannes.

Dannes smirked and jumps out of the way as the beam hits the statues, quickly turning them back to normal

"Why do I feel like I slept in a cement mixer?" Timmy wondered.

"Curse you traitor for changing my victims back to normal!" Gorgudusa yelled angrily.

"No cursing!" Nagules yelled at her, "And comb your hair, it's so dirty that it has snakes laying on it! Nag, nag, nag!" Nagules keeps nagging at the monsters as the kids smile to see Nagules luring Gorgudusa to a cliff.

"It's too annoying!" Gorgudusa shouted until she fell off the cliff screaming.

"Way to go Nagules!" SpongeHermes smiled.

"Thanks," Nagules spoke and they turn and gasp.

_'The heroes, all except for Jimocretes and Cosmoleus...'_ Jorgen narrates.

"Stop it already!" Jimocretes snapped.

_'Eh, who cares?' _Jorgen spoke, _'First crossing the River of Soda pop!'_ At his words, the river is turned into soda as SpongeHermes happily swims there. _'No, that's not it,'_ Jorgen spoke, _'Oh! How about the River of Chocolate Milk?'_ Then, the river turns to chocolate milk with the land made of ice cream as Timmy licks it. _'Wait! A better one!'_ Jorgen smiles, _'The River...of PAIN!!!!!'_

"This doesn't look so painful." Dannes said as he stared at the river.

Then, a small tiny cute bird flies in. It moves across the river when suddenly, a giant fish jumps in and eats the bird where a giant shark jumps and eats the fish and it jumps back into the water.

_'Fear of the deadly river ran across their puny faces.'_

"Will you stop calling us puny already?!" Jimocretes snaps at Jorgen.

"Well, me getting across this river is no problem." Dannes said as he flew into the air.

_'Yeah, except for the storm around the castle...OF PAIN!!!!!!!'_

"Of what?" Dannes asked until he was shocked by lighting and fell back down to the ground.

The five look at the electrocuted Dannes. "Now that was painful," he spoke.

"How can we cross the river now?" Jimocretes wondered.

"No problem!" SpongeHermes smiled and snaps his fingers where a small boat appears near the river.

_'They all thought sailing in their safe little boat was going to be a snap, until the dreaded sea monster came out of the river.'_

"We're gonna need a bigger boat." Cosmoleus said.

The monster, who looks like Ember, roars at them. Timmy takes out his sword and Dannes takes out his chain as the other are in fighting stance.

_'The six were ready but the monster was also a siren as it sings...'_

"**Oh Ember! You will remember!**" the siren monster sang, "**Ember! One thing remains!**" As the monster sings, the boys smile, now under a trance.

Nagules gasps; luckily the spell didn't affect her.

"Come on, you boys," Nagules said. "Snap out of it!"

"EMBER!!! EMBER!!! EMBER!!!" the boys cheered as the monster's flaming hair grew larger and becomes powerful.

Nagules cracked her whip at Ember, and the monster threw her tail into the river, causing a big wave to rock the boat.

"You boys better stop making that monster more powerful or you'll all be destroyed!"

"Ember?" Cosmoleus wondered as he and the others had confused looks.

"No!" The monster cried. "You're horrible nagging is breaking my spell!"

Nagules's eyes lit up and he puts on nag balm, and starts to nag on the boys. "You stand up straight!" She told Cosmoleus. "And you work out more," She told Dannes. "You get those teeth fix," She told Timmy. "And shine that helmet," She told Jimoleces. "And you get your hair cut!"

"Huh?" SpongeHermes wondered, "What happened?"

"A giant sea monster!" Cosmoleus noticed.

Dannes kept the monster from singing by closing her mouth with his chain, and Timmy ran up the chain and kicked the monster down into the river.

They reached land and get out of the boat. "Are we at the princess' castle yet?" SpongeHermes asked feeling exhausted.

_'Yeah, you're finally there,'_ Jorgen spoke.

"Whooo!!!" SpongeHermes cheered.

_'They went into the castle and found a big empty room with a door showing that the warrior princess was there.' _Jorgen narrated as it showed a sign that read 'warrior princess here'.

"Well, it's just smooth sailing from here on." Timmy said as he walked forward.

_'That is until the King and his assistant comes in.'_

"Oh, come on." Timmy said annoyed.

Then, the floor raises and King Gobot and Ooblar appear. "So, if it isn't Timmy and his trusty sidekicks."

"You let the princess go right now, Goobot!" Timmy ordered.

"Yeah!" Cosmoleus said, "It's not like you're gonna send a giant monster to kill us or something..."

_'And out of horrible coincidence, the giant alien chicken, Poultra came crashing through the wall roaring and clucking horribly.'_

"BUCK CAW!!!" it roared.

The five glare at Cosmoleus. "You just had to say it, didn't you?" Dannes asked.

_'Poultra started attacking by trying to peck the daylights of the mighty warriors along with Cosmoleus and the boring Jimocretes.'_

Jimocretes shouted, "For the last time, I AM NOT BORING!!!"

_'Yeah you are.'_

Jimocretes growled angrily and Poultra tried pecking at him, as he dodged out of the way.

Timmy swung his sword and Poultra while Dannes was swinging his chain Poultra growled as he stomped on Cosmoleus.

The five wince. "I'm okay!" Cosmoleus answered.

"How are we supposed to stop something this big?" Dannes asked.

_'Suddenly Jimocretes had an idea.'_

"I have an idea!" Jimocretes said.

"What?" Timmy wondered.

"Using the tactic I like to call-"

_'Blah, blah, blah,'_ Jorgen interrupted. _'He just went straight to the point of the plan.'_

"Hey!" Jimocretes snaps as he continued. "We're gonna hit Goobot with his own monster."

"How?" SpongeHermes wondered.

"Dannes, you have to lead Poultra over to Goobot." Jimocretes explained.

"Got it," Dannes agreed.

Dannes flew in the air and went in front of Goobot, "Hey bird-face! Come and peck at me over here!"

Poultra heard Dannes and stomped over at him, about to peck at him.

"No, don't-" Goobot warned, but it was too late.

Dannes quickly flew out of the way and Poultra knocked Goobot down. Then, Dannes tied his chain around Poultra's feet and Timmy kicked him down, making him land on Goobot and Ooblar.

"I hate this," Gobot groaned, "I hate this a lot."

"Me too, sire," Ooblar said.

"Ha!" Timmy gloated "Now let's save the princess."

The five nodded as they follow Timmy and head to the door. When Timmy reached the door, he sprayed breath-spray in his mouth and brushed his hair back, although it was still messy afterwards. Then, he kicked the door down and shouted, "Fear not warrior princess, Timmy the Barbarian is here!"

He smiles and opens the door to see the back of the warrior princess.

"It is me, princess," Timmy said heroically. "I'm the one who came to rescue you."

The others glared at him, feeling a little mad at him for taking all the credit.

"Timmy the Barbarian?" the princess asked.

The princess came up closer and Timmy gasp to see it was none other than Tootie.

"GAH! TOOTIE!!!" Timmy screamed.

"Were you really the one who rescued me?" She asked.

"Uh...uh..." Timmy was stammering.

"Yes, he was," Cosmo, Wanda, and SpongeHermes said.

"He totally came all the way here to save you." Dannes added.

"And he was hoping to get a thank you kiss afterwards." Jimocretes mentioned.

Tootie squealed happily as she jumped on Timmy and started kissing him as he screamed.

"If you thought the kisses were great, I can't wait for us to get married!" Tootie said as she smiled.

"NOOOO!!!" Timmy cried.

_'And with the princess rescued and the villains deafeated...'_ In reality, Tootie was hugging Timmy in her room with the others laughing. _'Timmy and Tootie were together forever! The end!'_ Jorgen spoke as he closed the book.

"This is the worst story EVER!!!" Timmy shouted until Tootie pulled him back down.

**The End**


End file.
